CityWOOF

Writin’s Lightin’ Up

Don’t disturb us if you hear us trying/To instigate the structure of another line or two/’Cuz writin’s lightin’ up/And I like life enough/To see it through

- Elton John/Bernie Taupin “Writing”

For as long as I can remember, one desire has burned brighter than any other in me.  The desire to create,  to do or make something really cool and receive praise and make people suck air – whether it be a surprised intake, an “Oh!” of happiness, or a sob, or perhaps a sudden lack of breath brought about by shock or surprise.

Growing up,  I was able to fill that desire most often by my writing of stories or papers…any time I was charged with a writing project, I turned in something pretty great.   English teachers loved me.  In 7th grade, one teacher basically accused me of plagiarsim, claiming that someone my age simply couldn’t possess the talent to write the story I had turned in.  Well, I had written it.   I still have it.

My first college-level writing class was taught by the teacher everyone hoped they wouldn’t get…she was the toughest of them all, regarded as crusty, mean, hard-to-please.   I turned in my first paper to her and she informed me, in front of the entire class, that my narrative essay was “the best paper that has ever been turned into me by a student in all of my years as a teacher”.

Yeah, I pretty much sailed through the rest of that course!

I love to read, I love to write.   I like great writers like Truman Capote and Ray Bradbury.  I like Stephen King.   Horror is my favorite genre.

My problem is that I am just not disciplined as a writer.   When I sit down and get “in the zone”,  I can really turn out some good work…it’s just hard to get me to sit there and do it.

BUT I have renewed interest.  There are barely any horror writers who are gay, and the one BIG one who is – Clive Barker – never writes about gay people.  It’s time for me to step up and write some horror fiction for the lavender crowd.  There is some out there, and I own every gay horror novel and short story collection.  I recently discovered a gay horror writer named Rick R. Reed, and he is very good.  I’m inspired, I’m ready…just gotta get my ass in front of the ‘puter, turn off the TV and write.

What I really need is a laptop, but I cannot afford one now.  A laptop would let me write anywhere, and that is what I need to be able to do.  Maybe after I sell my first gay horror story, novella or novel.

Sometimes I wonder if I’m being silly in believing that, at my age, I can still do something like become a writer.  If I am, don’t tell me.  Have to have something to hang onto, projects to work on, dreams to move toward.

Otherwise I’d shrivel up emotionally, maybe even physically.  Now there’s a gay horror image for you!